Category Archives: Columns

Cody’s Chaos Column 58-4

Cody Kimball

Webmaster

If you’re like me, you enjoy a good prank call, but you may also enjoy not getting caught even more. The Internet has provided an entertaining solution.

Prankdial.com is a site that satisfies that childish desire for mischief. The website allows for up to 3 free prank phone calls every day, to virtually any phone number in the country.

The phone calls also feature a variety of soundboard options, including songs like Rick Astley’s “Never Gonna Give You Up”, and quotes from shows such as “Dragonball Z” (“It’s over 9000!”).

Unless you acquire tokens, however, there is a short ad that plays before your selected joke. In addition to calls there is another page that allows you to send texts from one person to another – can you say “revenge?”

O. D.’s Rant 57-14

Donald Lierman

Sports Editor

Dearest reader, I have been maligned for too little or too many words in this, our last missive, of the book of O.D. I considered writhing or maybe just writing the word “THE” 666 times. But for you, dear faithful, I shall cry once more into the wilderness.

Again, I am forced to watch the Stanley Cup coverage when the national jerk works televise the games with the sound off. Their clear biases either send me to the gym or for a Canadian soda which I imbibe while screaming Iggy chants.

How to beat Phoenix? Find a ref who doesn’t feel it necessary to make up for being a bullied, inept hockey wannabee. Next, bring up the heavy hitters and don’t try to play finesse with wannabee Broad Street Bullies. Gosh, I’d love to see the Coyotes “toughies” on the ice with Dave “The Hammer” Schultz and company. Pant pant.

When I was blessed to meet the great Mickey Redmond, he had much to say about the playoffs.

“With the way the Western Conference is right now,” Redmond said, “I think the Wings are as good as anybody getting into the final four. If we continue to stay healthy and stay on track we have a good shot.”

On the “New” NHL…

“We must get rid of the phantom penalties,” Redmond said. “The way the game has cleaned up, without those calls the players would be able to exhibit their skills.”

No surrender Wings, we’ve battled back from worse than the leg-humping of desert critters.

Now for more hockey news.

Congratulations to Port Huron Icehawks’ Governor and Chief Financial Officer Frank Kinney for being selected 2009-2010 International Hockey League Executive of the Year.

I say it, the league says it, reader please see that the Icehawks are a class organization that excels despite having an arena that seats less than a fifth of some of their rivals.

Eh, Mr. Kinney, I, uhm, am graduating soon. Could you use a true hard-working fan-atic?

The playoffs are here. The Icehawks will be battling the team that defeated them in the seventh game of the finals two years ago. The time for revenge is ripe. Let’s douse the Komets.

Get out there and support the Hawks. I have had the honor to cover the players and the words class and dedication hardly describe these guys. They have an opportunity to bring the Turner Cup to our town.

This is playoff hockey, folks. This is Port Huron hockey. If you have never seen it, try it. Once you see it I feel it impossible you could not be hooked.

Icehawks’ Tab Lardner believes it will be a hard fought series.

“Fort Wayne is a strong team and have excellent older experience,” Lardner said, “but I don’t know what they will bring to the table. We have a lot of depth in our line up so we’ll keep the shifts short.

“Both teams are evenly matched. Whoever plays the game fundamentally will come out on top.”

Take a chance, dear reader, the Icehawks are one addiction that I think you will treasure.

Thanks to all involved. I’d just like to say … (rest chopped by the thought police).

O. D.‘s Rant 57-13

Donald Lierman

Sports Editor

Cheers to MSU’s NCAA tournament play. The naysayers didn’t have them even picked to make it through the first round. However, without their best player they made a great run.

Usually, I would never cheer for any team that defeated Sparty. However, the Butler Bulldogs come from a second tier conference and have earned the grudging respect of many of us green and whiters (although some say the foul situation gave the Bulldogs an extra link to their chain).

Remember the SC4 baseball team plays their games at Sanborn Park and the softball squad battles at Pine Grove Park. Come out and support your college athletes.

Now for the scoop. Many do not realize that our athletic programs do not have the scholarship allocations that other schools are given in the Michigan Community College Athletic Association. Walk-ons are more necessary in our athletic program than in other schools. Athletic Director Dale Vos addressed this discrepancy.

“Here are some ballpark figures,” Vos said. “Schoolcraft and Oakland have 12 tuition waivers (i.e. 12 players get all of their tuition paid for). Mott gets enough dollars to give 10 players in-district 12- hour scholarships.

“Kirtland get enough money to give eight players 15-hour in-district scholarships. Alpena gets 200 credit hours to allocate per year. Wayne County had eight tuition waivers, but I don’t know what they are going to come back with next year.

“In contrast, SC4 received $6932 this year. At $94 per hour (in-district tuition and fees) – that gives us 73.74 total hours to allocate,” Vos continued. “Delta and Macomb have roughly the same scholarship distribution as us and Henry Ford receives no athletic aid.”

What this tells O.D. is what a great success rate SC4 has accomplished with a minimal amount of money to be allocated to draw student athletes. Kudos to all in the athletic department that have made our sports programs so successful!

Go Gunners! As Arsenal chases their first English Premier League football (soccer for ye Yanks) title in years, there is a three way log jam between them, Chelsea and Manchester United (boo!!!).

For those who still believe that soccer is an effete sport, tune into the EPL or the European Champions League. Better yet, take a couple weeks off for this summer’s World Cup.

O. D. ‘s Rant 57-12

Donald Lierman

Sports Editor

The SC4 men’s basketball team not only made college history this year by making it to the national tournament but performed not too shabbily there either.

The Skippers dropped their first game at the NJCAA Division II National Tournament in Danville, Illinois to Lewis & Clark College (IL) by a score of 78-70.

They won their next two games against Bismarck State College (ND), 93-87, and Monroe CC (NY), 83-67. Finally, on Saturday, March 20, they were downed by Pima (AZ), 59-52.

“We were very disappointed when we lost the opener to Lewis and Clark,” Coach Dale Vos said.  “However, as has been the case with this team all year, we got up and went to work and still finished eighth in the nation, no small feat.

“I just love the work ethic, togetherness, teamwork and defensive intensity of this team. I also love the leadership and love for each other that this team displayed all year.

“What a great ride they gave me and the rest of the coaching staff.”

O.D. say conceptualize ‘dis, please. As a community college, SC4 has two year turnover.  Coach Vos and his staff have two years to mold a team for basically one run per group of players.  Add to that a scholarship difference and boom, was ‘dis not amazing?

Congratulations to all involved. The college should honor these student athletes for their achievements. Be proud. Be a Skipper!

All I can say is ha ha ha, University of North Carolina. Your arrogance, after last year’s victory over MSU, reaped just deserts. Who cares if you win the NIT? You’re a classless organization who didn’t make the Big Dance after winning the year before. Come on. Brag about how great your team is now, coach.

My Wings. First, you knock off Calgary in Calgary with less than two minutes to go. Then, on to Edmonton to tie the game with .5 seconds left. Saturday, you win in overtime in Vancouver with .3 seconds remaining in overtime.

Despite all the injuries, the Red Wings have battled back to make a run for the Cup again.  Forget the Miracle Mets. With the injury (knock on wood) curse fading and those players hitting mid-season form now, look forward to some fun when the playoffs begin.

I cannot get over the negativity towards the Detroit Lions looking at Adam “Pacman” Jones as a potential free agent. Hey, you forgive Michael “I am so tough I torture and murder dogs” Vick.

At least Jones is man enough to whomp on his fellow humans. Give me a mean Jones over a cowardly Vick any day of the week.

1.5 million dollars, no doubt someone in the league would pay Judas Iscariot the same if he could throw a football. Of course, it was Philadelphia who signed Vick.

O. D.‘s Rant 57-11

Donald Lierman

Sports Editor

Let ‘em play, let ‘em play, let ‘em play …

Now that’s old time hockey. The Olympics provided a stage for what purists call the way the game should be played.

Few whistles, hard hitting, tight checking… all that was left out was a few droppings of the gloves.  Oh, I forgot no Bettman and no NHL Toronto High Court Tribunal to dictate which team should have extra advantage… oops, I mean whether it was a goal or not.

The final game’s outcome would have hurt much worse if Mike Babcock wasn’t the coach of Team Canada. Mike is a class act who takes both wins and defeats as a true professional.

There are the cretins out there well play the “Nah Nah you lost” card against us U.S. fans. But hey, scoring with 24 seconds left to send it to overtime makes the game a victory in my book.

Both teams were winners. If only anyone but that classless Crosby scored the winning goal.  You have got to admit the Devil got his due, but we got a game for the ages. No whining just good, hard hockey.

Speaking of whiners. O.D. has not only covered but has been a spectator at many events in many diverse sports.

Yet, even he was appalled at the antics of the Oakland women’s basketball coach in last Wednesday’s 66-55 SC4 victory. Throwing fits then rolling over when chastised by refs, acting out. This is how you teach values to your players?

That is only what was viewed from the stands. If only the SC4 players could tell their tales.   Oh, that’s because our team comports themselves as professionals.

Even Bobby Knight would blush.

Congrats, Lady Skips in coming within seven against number one ranked Schoolcraft, Friday.  The next day, Schoolcraft humbled Western Conference and number 14 Lake Michigan College, 85-54. Which leads me to, why wasn’t SC4 ranked?

As to men’s basketball, pending Wednesday’s District 9 quarterfinals result against Alpena, the Skippers should be heading to Mott Community College in Flint on March 5 and 6 for the NJCAA District 8 and 9 semi-finals and championships.

With Henry Ford and Mott ranked nationally in the top five, what an opportunity to attend some highly competitive basketball and support a Skippers basketball squad that should also be ranked.

All right, O.D. will admit when he was wrong. The 2010 Winter Olympics were absolutely fabulous. The camera work allowed home spectators to feel a part of the action. O.D. does not have H.D. but felt like he was there.

Yes, those athletes put in the dues to get there. Only when the professional status gets crossed does this humble reporter tremble.

But O.D. was right about curling which is becoming more and more popular. The U.S. performance was sadly lacking yet the competition overall was superb.

Those who decry the sport because it is different, well, some of those have yet to learn that T.P. is for something besides tossing on a neighbor’s house.

So Johnny Damon (demon?)  is a Detroit Tiger. Wasn’t he the guy who said he would never be a Yankee and now claims to be such a factor in their purchased title?

I used to be a fan until he whored off to New York and went corporate. Remember C,S,N&Y’s “Almost Cut My Hair?” That’s what happens when you trim those locks for a few dollars more.

And they got rid of Curtis Granderson?

Just a reminder that O.D. has gone global.  More rantings can be found on www.bareman25.blogspot.com.

O. D.‘s Rant 57-10

Donald Lierman

Sports Editor

I nearly changed the name of the column to Rah Rah’s Rant. Because O.D. is excited.

Pending Wednesday’s outcome with Oakland Community College, the 11 nationally ranked SC4 men’s basketball team could be playing for a slice of the MCCAA Eastern Conference pie.

Saturday, February 20, the 5 ranked Mott Bears will come to town. The game will tip off at 3 p.m. following the Lady Skips at 1 p.m.

Last term, the volleyball team played for first, now the Skippers could be sending another banner to the rafters.

I told Mr. Vos after the volleyball victory that we should be aiming for three banners this year.  With the Lady Skips standing at only two losses that could very well happen. We may not be Big Ten but these student athletes put out just as much, if not more, effort.

Speaking of the Big Ten, rumors (OK maybe pipe dreams) abound that the University of Texas may join the Big Ten.

Imagine the Big Ten suddenly treated with respect again.

Imagine the rivalries…like waking up in bed with…

A Gary Bettman voodoo doll. Hey, the Saints fans were carting around Manning ones. Can someone get me the address of the manufacturer? I would tie it together with a Sid “the DUH” Crosby one and dunk it in Lake St. Clair. Hmmm, Satanic carp, anyone?

Speaking of the Super Bowl, the game was great, the commercial bashed men like a red-headed O.D. and I wished I was there for the party. Their voodoo must work when you see the replay of the Favre and Manning interceptions.

Hmmm, send those dolls by priority mail, will ya?

Yawn, the Olympics have begun. I lost all interest when the professional athletes began to compete in a corporate sponsored showcase. Profits not competition have become the point.

Already there has been a real tragedy. But this real tragedy will quickly be forgotten in the mudslide of sound bytes about whose daddy died yet the rich skater/skier/whatever overcame such overwhelming difficulties (like the million dollar sponsorship) to win a medal that will soon have corporate logos stamped on the back.

Not to mention that every fourth year the Olympics decimate the NHL schedule. Forget my beloved Red Wings, the NHHELL jams together the schedule to get 80 games into the same span of time. Can’t lose a dollar, eh? Just the quality.

Will curling be back? That is one sport I do enjoy. There aren’t too many corporate grants for Scottish shuffleboard on ice. Add a few brewskis and let’s just wait to drop the gloves… uh, I mean stones.

Just a reminder that O.D. has gone global. More rantings can be found on www.bareman25.blogspot.com.

O. D.’s Rant 57-9

Support your local Skippers athletics!
‘Twas a big day Saturday for both the men’s and women’s basketball athletic programs. The men’s team knocked off number one in the nation Henry Ford Community College, 76-72. This was the first singeing of the Hawks’ feathers all year. Henry Ford had won 19 consecutive games until that night.
The Skippers trail the first place Hawks and number six in the nation Mott Community College Bears by one game. Their 7-2 record places them in third with plenty of time to make a move on first place.
The Lady Skippers won handily against Henry Ford by 14 points, 90-76. The Lady Skippers reside in second place in their conference.
They trail number one in the nation Schoolcraft Community College by two games with a 9-2 record. Schoolcraft has yet to lose a game and are 12-0 in the Eastern Conference and 22-0 overall.
Just as our Lady Skippers volleyball squad was in a fight to the finish, so are our basketball teams. Now is the time to fill the gym and cheer on the ladies and gents teams as they make their run for the roses.
The next home game is on Saturday, February 6 at the school gymnasium. Kirtland Community College comes to town. The ladies’ game begins at 1 p.m. and the men’s at 3 p.m.
Call me rah-rah if you will but these student athletes are performing outstandingly and deserve the support of the fans, the staff, and the community.
Don’t change the column’s name but again I am rah-rah for the Port Huron Icehawks. I don’t know why McMorran is not filled for every game. I could understand this 25 years ago when the teams skated like a group of old timers who just finished the keg.
But this is quality hockey. The price is reasonable. The ownership supports our community. Why not support a team that cares?
Now for the ranting (hip-hip hooray!).
According to msn.foxsports.com, Miguel Cabrera spent three months in rehab after supposedly being a bit tipsy for the big series to conclude last year’s pennant race.
Being drunk (or at least hung over as most unrepentant Lions fans on Monday) then playing sports on the major league level is a time honored tradition. In the early days of baseball players had to be dragged to the ball park from the barroom. The Detroit Lions won a championship with Bobby Layne who, if the rumors are true, did not need blocking. The alcohol fumes of his cadence would stupefy the defensive line.
As baseball is now an entertainment property of the New York Yankees, perhaps all players should be required to drink a twelve before every game. That way money would not determine the world championship, but the strongest liver.

O. D.‘s Rant

Just as every cop is a criminal / and all your sinners saints…
Well, Glimmer Twins, we may as well bid sympathy to the Old Nick, for fair play is definitely being thrown out with the bath water. Let the ranting begin.
Watching Saturday’s game with the Red Wings and the Dallas Stars, I can only come to the conclusion that if there is not an unofficial prejudice against the Red Wings, the NHL officiating staff from the ice to Toronto should be held for charges of gross ineptitude.
During the shootout, a shot sent Wings goalie Jimmy Howard to the goal line to trap it. An NHL referee was standing a foot away, level with the goal line. He waved the play a save. Another referee skates up and whispers to check the play with Bettman’s lair in Toronto.
During the consultation there are shots of what appears to be the original referee being forced to justify his case. After prolonged consideration a goal is given to the Stars that proves to be the deciding measure of the shootout.
I challenge the viewer to show me indisputable evidence that the puck was over the line. That is the rule in overturning an on ice call.
Does this mean the referee who made the call is so blind that he cannot see the play better than an idiot in Toronto who has more note, indisputable evidence from afar?
Some may claim it is only a point. Yet a point could determine whether the Wings make the playoffs. The Wings play with honor. Imagine how that must stick in the craw of the suits.
This is only an example of what I have seen over the years. A non-call here, an overturned call there. The evidence is damning. I challenge a non-partial observer to overturn my call.
Finally, get rid of the NHL players participating in the Olympics. Number one, they are not amateurs. Number two, they screw up the schedule so badly that races are being determined in February. Number three, someone tell NHL wannabe Fuhrer Gary ‘hit them with a purse’ Bettman, that not only will the NHL never be the NBA, true fans don’t want it to be.
Check out www.firebettman.com for a few laughs.
On a sober note, if you can, contribute to the Red Cross for Haitian relief. We are so lucky in this country to have some sort of infrastructure. Our country is in desperate financial straits thanks to George ‘what me worry?’ Bush but when an event like the Haitian earthquake occurs, America takes the lead. That is what makes our country still the greatest.
Look around, if Port Huron had such a magnitude earthquake it would be leveled too. Let’s count our blessings and help our fellow brethren.
OK, I sounded like Tiny Tim for a sec. Next time, back to baring the fangs at affronts against truth, justice, and the American way!